According to an ongoing Positive Coaching Alliance poll, parents of the most successful athletes “release” their daughters to the sport, the organization (Club), and to the coach. By releasing young athletes to the game and coach, parents are telling their children that the seasons’ successes and failures are theirs — problems and solutions belong to the athlete as well. There are not many arenas in a young person’s life where parents can say, “this is your thing,” but it can be done in athletics (and in most cases, needs to be done).
Here are some “RED FLAGS” indicating parents have not released their athlete:
1) Parents continuing to live their own personal athletic dream through their child.
2) A parent who tends to share in the credit when the child has done well or been victorious, ie “I taught her how to that”, or “that reminds me of me.”
3) A parent who finds him or herself trying to solve their child’s athletic related problems ie. “I’ll just call the coach and solve this.”
Parents should realize that they are taking things too seriously and have not released their child to the activity when:
1) Continuing to coach a child when the athlete is often more skilled and knows more about the game than the parent.
2) Being a nervous wreck before their child’s competition or practice.
3) Having difficulty bouncing back after their child’s team suffers a defeat.
4) Making mental notes in order to give their child advice at the conclusion of the game / practice.
5) Becoming verbally critical of other players, other parents, coaches and/or officials.
Remember, there are only four roles in youth athletics: spectator, competitor, an official and coach.
If parents are able to act appropriately, players indicate that they love to have them present as spectators at their games. On the other hand, if parents cannot adhere to reasonable standards of behavior concerning sportsmanship, poise, and confidence, many young athletes feel they would rather have their parents stay home.
Here’s more parental advice on youth sports. (With thanks to Tstreet Volleyball Club for providing this information)